Kids are our everything, right? However, they are also the eternal cause of stress and nervousness. Since the day they are born, you cannot but worry about their well-being. When they are little, you worry whether they are full, dry and healthy. When they grow a bit, you worry if they are developing right and whether you do everything to raise them smart and kind. When they are teenagers, you worry about them getting in trouble, being late from a party or falling for a wrong person. And even when they are grown up, you still cannot but worry.
Some people take parenting quite easy. They do what they have to do and don't worry unless something serious happens. Other parents, however, are constantly under a lot of stress. It is a feeling that you cannot get rid of. Such parents tend to be around their children all the time overprotecting them. It is not only annoying and even harmful for children, but also very unhealthy for parents. Being under a constant stress can seriously harm your health and make you feel and look older. So, if you think you are stressful because of your kids all the time, do something. Here are the first things you may try.
Sincere talks are the key to trust
Usually the main reason of parents worrying is distrust. You don't trust that your mother can successfully babysit your kid. You don't trust your boy to do the homework and study hard. You don't believe that your teenage daughter won't drink alcohol at a party. I'm not telling you to start believing everything they say. You just need to practice sincere honest talks with your kids from the very early age. They should be able to tell you everything. If you are sure that your kids share every little detail of their lives with you, you will worry a bit less.
Don’t parent hard, parent smart
Quality time with your children is paramount but are you sure that all the time you spend together a quality time? Sometimes we lecture them, while they are all zoned out and we count that as a “conversation”. We watch an old movie while they are staring at their phone and count that as a “family pastime”. As a result, we spent all those hours annoying our kids instead of bonding with them.
As kids grow, opportunities to involve in some meaningful shared activity become even scarcer. You should use each and every one. When your kid comes to you and asks, “Can you help me do my homework?” – don’t send them to Google for the answers and don’t lecture them on how they should pay more attention in the class. Sit down with them and ask, what exactly makes the homework difficult? Is it the subject they don’t like? Is it the new teacher who “changed the rules”? Is it anxiety about going to class tomorrow and facing mockery? Are they being bullied? Do they sleep well? Maybe they have their first crush without even realizing that? Try see the root of the problem. This will save you both a lot of time and stress.
Discipline from the very start is a must
Spoiled kids are usually the ones who misbehave and make their parents uneasy. Many people allow their kids a lot when they are small and then get surprised when they show their attitude and cause troubles as teenagers. You need to set a strict discipline in your home and clearly state what is allowed and what is forbidden. If kids are used to such order from the early age, they will probably keep it as they grow up. Thus, your will have fewer reasons for stress.
Do something for yourself
Many mothers say that yoga can really help to relax and to forget about all the problems in the world. There are many other healthy ways to relax and to spend some time for yourself. You can have a massage, go swimming, or meditate. If nothing helps, you should try a therapist or support group; maybe such options will help a bit.
Parenting is not an easy job and you get stressed and nervous in any way. However, there are always means to relax and to calm down. Find your own ways and enjoy this gift of being a parent to the fullest.