"Cover letters" are an interesting concept.

As is the idea that they are the "bar" by which hiring companies decide if YOU are an interesting concept.

And every time I go to write one, I'm either one extreme or the other. I'm either
1) "F-yes! I got this. Gonna knock this sh*t out of the park and blow their socks off with me."

or

2) "OMG. Why the F do I have to write this? Just look at my resume and see if you want me."

And maybe that's a "me" thing.

Or perhaps it's how many people feel about having to include a cover letter when hunting for a job.

Now don't get me wrong...I totally understand the reason AND need for them. Companies want to see who they are dealing with, and by way of a one-pager, they believe they can screen out the unwanted quickly.

Here's my gripe with cover letters, though...

You're giving me one first-impression shot to awe you. And I'm one of those that dazzles a bit more once -- and as you continue to -- get to know me. As well as, as I get to know

the business,

brand,

company,

position

or whatever it is.

Do you know what I mean?

Like for those of us that are

semi socially-awkward,

somewhat introverted,

anxious by nature,

OR THOSE OF US WHO HAVE BEEN OUT OF THE TRADITIONAL WORKFORCE AND RAISING BABIES FOR WHAT FEELS LIKE A BAZILLION YEARS,

it can be hard to wow a potential employer in 200-1000 words --
EVEN THOUGH WE ARE F*CKING SMART!

Let alone very well knowing that you might not be impressed that, for the better part of the last decade, I've proved I can

keep a clean house,

keep kids alive,

get a crapton of laundry done in a day,

cook like motha',

help with homework,

transport all over Timbuktu,

and keep my witts about me.

And so I'll be passed over because I haven't "worked" in nine years.

I wrote three books, sure. But I self-published them, so you say to yourself, "Anyone can do that."

I got into law school, and that's impressive. But I dropped out, and that's not so impressive.

I've got a pretty diverse-professional background, but all you read into that is that I'm someone who's a bit "all over the place."

I'm applying for things I'm under-qualified for because I'm a dreamer, and why the hell not.

But you think, “why the hell are you applying???"

I don't know about this whole cover letter business.

I just feel like you don't know if you like a chocolate unless you get a good taste of what you're working with, of what's on the inside, and I just do not believe that having to summarize

who I am,

what I've done,

and what I can do

into one

or two

informative yet concise,

well-written,

cleverly delivered paragraphs,

realllllllly tells you who I am.

Perhaps it does, though...I don't know.

I just know that who I am and what I have to offer is a longer conversation and one that I likely won't get to have since we won't make it past the cover letter.

Forgive me, folks.

This was a spontaneous ramble.

Now I need a Bramble.