Is it wrong to be jealous of my two-year-old? It really hits me while I’m sitting at work around 1:00pm and I know at that moment… she is taking a nap. Naps. That’s just one reason being a two-year-old is way more fun that being a 32-year-old. It gets even worse when you consider being a 32-year-old with a two-year-old.

When you’re two… it’s fun to learn. When you’re 32… you don’t have time to learn, and if you do, it costs a lot of money.

When you’re two… your books have fun words and lots of pictures. When you’re 32… you don’t have time to read books (with long words and no pictures.)

When you’re two… you get to do arts and crafts every day. When you’re 32… you don’t have time for arts and crafts, unless you’re an art teacher.

When you’re two… people buy you things all the time. When you’re 32… you get gifts on your birthday and Christmas.

When you’re two… your attitude is somewhat accepted because you’re in the “terrible twos.” When you’re 32… you’re attitude is known as “bitch.”

When you’re two… you get rewarded when you pee in the bathroom. When you’re 32… you can’t go pee in the bathroom alone. Ever.

When you’re two… you can fall asleep anywhere, in any position. When you’re 32… you just, can’t do this. It actually may be illegal.

When you’re two… you get rocked to sleep. When you’re 32… you don’t sleep (and haven’t been able to sleep in for at least two years.)

When you’re two… your weekends are full of fun play. When you’re 32… you’re weekends are full of endless event and party plans (in the midst of trying to run errands.)

When you’re two… people think your rolls are cute. When you’re 32… you don’t want rolls, but they are turning up like never before.

When you’re two… you can wear whatever you want in public. Even dress up like Disney characters and no one says a thing. When you’re 32… if you do this, you may end up on a site like “People of Walmart.”

When you’re two… you have a stylist, hairdresser, chef and chauffeur. When you’re 32… you don’t have time or energy to make yourself look presentable or cook because you are too busy chauffeuring.

When you’re two… everything you say is cute. When you’re 32… you better watch what you say so you don’t offend someone.

When you’re two… everything is new, fun and exciting. When you’re 32… well, all that new, fun and exciting stuff is just rare.

When you’re two… you can go trick-or-treating… When you’re 32… you have to steal your two-year-olds candy to keep the sugar intake under control.

Now to be fair, there are some things that are better about being 32: You have that adorable two-year-old you get to see live a dream life!