1. You muted your microphone on a Zoom call but forgot to turn your camera off to yell at a child to get back on their kindergarten Google Meet. Your entire team is now terrified of making you mad.
2. You made an unexpected appearance in said kindergarten Google Meet that you thought was muted but wasn’t. Now your child’s entire kindergarten class is also terrified of you.
3. You pull on a sweater over your dirty t-shirt ten seconds before a meeting and pop in with a big smile and a bigger cup of coffee.
4. People constantly tell you that you look tired. Mostly because you are tired. So tired. But you just smile and nod because responding would make more people scared of you.
5. You have attended a meeting, paid attention, changed a diaper, unloaded the dishwasher, and fed the dog in the last three minutes.
6. You have been hit in the head with a Nerf dart or some sort of ball during a video meeting.
7. You don’t wear real pants anymore. Ever.
8. You are stretched so thin that you think you might not be able to do this any longer.
9. When you get the rare chance to go to the office, you cherish it. You can be alone and sit in silence and drink coffee and think without hearing crying or barking or the tv or a microwave or screaming YouTubers.
10. You have had a meeting or important call while crouching in a closet or in the bathroom because it’s the only place your kids can’t find you.

Until Next Time,

Jamie