Summer is probably my favorite time of the year. School is out, work is way more relaxed, and the weather is AWESOME. I am a new mom of one cute little boy---so I am still getting used the typical summer hustle of camps, enrichment programs, and sports workshops. Luckily I have a great group of mom friends from tiger moms to free rangers (ok maybe not quite free rangers) –but I do know a lot of moms with a number of different parenting philosophies. These women are so clutch to have in my corner as I try to figure this mom thing out.

One thing I am pretty sure of is that I WILL NOT RAISE SPOILED KIDS. Sometimes my heart sinks when I glance at the Pack ‘N’ Play in the corner that is filled to the brim with a lot random blobs of toys. (By the way my son is still of the age where a cardboard box will blow his mind.) I can’t tell you what half of those toys do—but at some point in time they were important to somebody in this house. What is even more horrific is the thought that buying these tchotchkes for my little Pookie at the age of 2 could create a “Gimmee monster” bratboy at the age of 16.

I believe children will be what they see –so we as parents (otherwise known as the masters of our kids’ universes) –have a responsibility to show our kids how NOT to be spoiled or bratty. So here is my list of 4 ways to teach your kids not be spoiled this summer this summer. You can teach your child not to be spoiled by cultivating the concepts of gratitude, empathy, and compassion for others. Here are a few activities that will help you do it while having fun this summer

1) Vacation Allowance- So a vacation allowance is really important. This is basically an allotment of money set aside for your child to spend on whatever he or she wants during your vacation. Putting a vacation allowance in place BEFORE you leave –can do wonders to save you money as you peruse the pricey gift shops at your vacation destination.An easy rule of thumb for your vacation allowance could be [2(Age of your child) x (Days on vacation)]/2. For example if you have a 5 year old and your family is vacationing for 4 days –the math goes like this: 2(5)(4)/2 =$20 Total. Yes I know that toys at gift shops can be expensive –so encourage your child to use their allowance only for small little extras—so the money will last longer. And don’t forget to be firm about the meeting of the allowance. When the allowance money has been spent, it is gone. I think the concept of an allowance can be taught as early as 3 or even 2. My 2 your old son definitely know when something is “all gone”, and setting a spending limit will help a child to make better decisions on what items are most important.

2) Toiletries Collection- This tip works best if you are staying in a hotel for at least 2-3 days. Plan to collect the toiletries from the hotel each day. Put them in plastic bags and keep them with you. If you happen to see a person in need while you are out and about, you will have those items available to give to them.

3) Leave Your Comfort Zone, Respectfully: One of the biggest difference I have noticed about traveling with kids versus without kids, is that your tolerance for hotel/accommodation foolishness goes to zero once that little one is born. In my 20s, I could deal with a slightly sketchy hotel with mediocre service. Now it just does not work for me. I, like most people would gladly pay more for the assurance of certain safety standards or even the level of service that very nice accommodations will provide. That is all well and good—but I have found that depending on where you are traveling to, the most interesting areas of a new country or city lie outside of touristy walls. Certainly by no means should you put you or your family in danger by going to an unsafe place. But it is important for children (especially older children) to see the range of living standards that exist in this country and around the world. And if you are going to visit such areas, please remember to do so in respectful nature. No one likes to feel like they are feature exhibits in a zoo! Enabling your child understand the inequities in this world will help to pave the way to the development of compassion for others, empathy, and best of all GRATITUDE for what they have.

4) Give Thanks: It’s so important for us as parents to lead by example at times. Giving thanks and showing appreciation for the opportunities and resources that you have, is great for your children to see –and a critical part of your own happiness and the level of satisfaction in your own life.