One day several years ago when I picked up my daughter from preschool, I asked her who she played with.

“Nobody,” she answered, which is the same response she gave on most days. I asked her why, and like always, she said, “I already have a friend.”

One good friend – a little girl she met shortly after birth and felt really comfortable around – is all she wanted. And at three years old, it was okay for her to feel that way. But I told her that as she gets older, I hoped she'd discover the joy and necessity in having multiple friends, because as she weaves in and out of different stages of life, the friends who come and go (and often stay) will make a lasting impact.

As a mom, there have been six friends – or groups of friends – that I couldn’t have gotten through these years without. I hope my daughter is just as lucky when she grows up.

The Childhood Friend

You can still crack each other up by saying the one word that always grossed you out. She can laugh at you about who you picked to be your first kiss, and you can laugh right back.

As moms, you can discuss all the ridiculous things your kids want, because “we never had that when we were kids.” And when things with husbands and kids get rough, the best therapy that either of you have is to make fun of the things you used to take so seriously – when life was nothing but simple.

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The Veteran Mom

When you have your first baby, this is the one who gets you past the “Oh, shit” moments. She knows what color his poop should be. She’ll tell you that no, you don’t have to rush to the ER if he sleeps through a feeding. She can reassure you that at some point, every new mom feels like the most helpless, clueless person on the planet. She can also promise you that this will get easier, and that you’ll actually miss these days (even though at times it’s the last thing you can believe).

The Fellow New Mom

Let’s face it: Misery loves company. So when you bring that baby home and have no idea what you’re doing, it helps to have someone else around who’s clueless too. She understands if you’re 45 minutes late because you were cleaning up a blowout, or that the little rascal decided his belly wasn’t actually full when he stopped nursing 20 minutes before you needed to leave the house.

Maybe she’ll stay home from work and you’ll go back, or vice-versa. But for now, while the rest of the world keeps moving, you can marvel at these amazing little creatures that you each made, and agree that this is a pretty cool job to have at the moment.

The Preschool Mom

If you’re a stay-at-home mom, it’s a sweet thing when your kids start enjoying playing with other kids. Yes, you’ve been lucky to be able to work on crafts and color and sing ABC’s, but after a few years of it, you've certainly had days where it becomes mundane. When the time comes for them to go to preschool, play dates after school are not only for the little ones.

While the kids run around at the park, you can talk about what you used to do for a living before you became a mom – allowing you to say out loud that you do have skills other than making star-shaped PBJ’s. You can talk about husbands, and often, you end up feeling a lot better about yours after hearing about the one who’s NEVER wiped a butt. And you can soak

The Sports Mom

Getting your kids into activities is fun for them, but it's also a sure way to lose your mind if you have several kids involved in something simultaneously.

A sports mom is someone fun to talk to while you watch your kids play ball, but she’s also the one to call when Kid A has practice starting 20 minutes before Kid B’s game, and your husband has a late business dinner. She’ll tell you when fundraisers are due, what field you’re supposed to be on, what night the coach switched practice to, and what color socks you’re supposed to buy.

And she’ll never make you feel like a total moron for not knowing the answers yourself, because she’ll need you the next week for all the same reasons.

The Non-Mom

Maybe she’s a mom to someone, but that’s not the reason you’re connected. You know her because of a skill or a hobby or a job that has nothing to do with your kids. It’s just about you. Because you weren’t always a mom. You’re not ONLY a mom.

And so when you’re working out together, it’s just about how strong you are. When you’re at work, it’s just about how your boss is making you feel. When you’re reading the same book, it’s just about what each of you are taking away from it. When you’re starting a new career, she simply motivates and believes in you and makes you feel like you can conquer the world.

Because feeling good about yourself, and having friends who make you feel like you rock, makes you a happier, better mom.

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