Having a child with special needsa chronic health diagnosismay seem challenging and hard at times. It will test both of you and your familys will. You may look at it from a place of, Why me?, Why them? or from a place of guilt, fear, anger and finger-pointing of blame.

These are all normal responses.

I know first-hand. But what I am going to say next may be hard, even challenging, but may free you at the same time.

Change your way of thinking. Be positive! Stay strong! Look for the life lessons in front of you. Right away, you might be thinking, Yeah right?! How am I supposed to do that with all the negative things going on around me?

It may seem crazy, but you have to do it. For your child, for you, for your family.

Take my sons cerebral palsy and epilepsy diagnoses or my Lupus diagnosis, for example. I did the whole grieving thing, the blame game, the Why me? Why them?. But when I started to change my way of thinking, things got easier.

It did take a conscious effort and it was hard at first, but I like to think of it as riding a bike. Once you get the hang of it, you never forget, and it becomes easier. And yes, just like riding a bike, you may fall and scrape a knee, but keep getting back on that metaphorical bike and keep pedaling.

I will always long for my sons diagnoses to change or for him to walk one day, but instead of worry and guilt about his future, I think of the fact that my son is here to teach me and others lessons, whether humility, compassion, patience, acceptance or advocation, I wouldnt be able to write this blog or talk to others about my sons condition if he never had his issues.

He has opened up so many doors of opportunity for himself and others. He goes through every day with a smile and lights up a room. Thats a child with a gift that is contagious and shares with others.

His condition has taught my husband and me to work as a team and has taught my other sons lessons as well.

Now that I have learned to accept these lessons and look on a brighter side, I am less angry, sad, negative and resentful. My days are more sunny and it makes me stronger.

This may be seem like an impossible job, but you can do it. It makes our family life much more cheerful.

I have found a saying that seems to help. Repeat this in your head on any occasion: Give me strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Its a daily reminder to make acceptance the foundation of everything you do and say.

Welcome the happy moments and the obstacles that upset and challenge you, because both teach you lessons. Acceptance is appreciating the things as they are, this perspective lets you live in the moment. Value whats happening and feel calm in your body and mind. When you have acceptance, you realize everything is uncertain and simply receive what comes to you.

You have the power to change and grow. Take a new stance on life. Live, love, learn and laughfour Ls that could change your life.

With love and acceptance,
Trish