Some day, "Kids don’t see color". Of course, they do. As certainly as they can see flowers of different colors and rainbows. Do they let it affect their behavior? NO. And that is what we want to ensure.

The second myth is that it has to be a “Let’s sit down and talk kind of conversation.” It is small discussions that can lead to a lifetime of impact with kids.

Without these conversations, doubt and disparity slowly creep into our children’s lives and we don’t even realize it. From those around them, from our silence.

One afternoon, my son came home and told me, ”My friends and I put our hands together and they said I was different. ” I told this incident to many of my mom friends and ALL of them surprisingly had heard their children and their friends doing the same. I asked them what they had told their kids and many just laughed it off or said, “It’s just something kids do.”

Yes, it is something kids do yet such moments must be used as a learning opportunity.

Use Books To Fight Colorism

In a world where fair is beautiful and dark is exotic. Where fairness creams sell like hot cakes all over the world. Where kids are told their skin color is the color of poop (yup! Two readers told me this about their child.), we must teach our kids how to hold their own early. To fill them with so much confidence via fact-based answers that they can stand up for themselves.

Now, my children are on the fairer side of the Indian color spectrum. Yet, my son was quite curious to learn about what makes his skin tone different from his own sister. This is why I finally wrote a book How Our Skin Sparkles as an important introduction to the world where many feel all Indians are of a similar skin tone. In fact, after the release of my book, some desi moms commented that the kids on the cover are not dark enough to their liking.

How talking about skin color helps our children?

• To create confidence within our kids to stand up for themselves.
• To build empathy for others.
• To build world awareness of the ways we may be different and yet the same.
• To raise cultural pride and bring home how our heritage defines us.
• To help kids understand why they need to stand up to colorism, racism when they see it.

That is what this conversation aims to reiterate. That a person is made up of their actions, choices, feelings, and likes. Not by the color of their skin.

It is more important now than ever that we talk to our children early about body positivity, self-confidence, and inclusion.

What are some other myths around this?

Talking about Our Family is Enough to Discuss Skin Color

I was surprised how few parents talked about the science behind our skin color. I am so glad that all the parents and teachers who picked up my book were happy with the way the disparities in color were portrayed and explained in detail.

You Need the Perfect Words

Every child is different. Not every child is ready to comprehend the conversation coming their way. Keep in mind the mental state of your child before you talk to them. Age 3, say if this comes up, you would start by just talking about the different skin colors within the family. Keep it simple.

It has to be an Us vs Them Discussion

When your kids have questions or come to you with comments via people around them, remember to not put anyone down. Talk about skin color in positive terms and let your child understand why someone would have a certain bias.

Talking is Enough

Diversify your reading and content. Look for books, movies, plays, festivals that you can immerse yourself in to help your children to help them see the differences and similarities between people. This could be as difficult as looking for local festivals from other cultures or as easy as picking a multilingual show on your streaming service.

And you are done …

“Oh, so and so actress has become so much fairer” or “Take care of your skin, you don’t want to go darker.” If you hear such comments, especially in the presence of your children, address them. Even if it is in the content you consume. If you notice something, point out why it is wrong for your child.

Check out all the multicultural books I have written to empower children i n different spheres of life.