If you are anything like me, you probably spend far too much time thinking about, crying over, complaining about or overanalyzing every single person or experience that you encounter. I did it for most of 2018, despite my plan not to.

ENOUGH. Enough of that crap.

Enough with expectations.

Enough with anxiety.

Enough with guilt.

Enough with judgment.

Enough with all the freakin’ unwarranted analysis.

Enough wasting your time on the unimportant and enough wasting your days being anything other than joyful and appreciative.

Here are 10 shiitakes that I tried not to give in 2018, and WILL NOT give in 2019 (and you shouldn’t either):

#1. What the heck anyone thinks of you. I mean anyone — except for yourself and maybe your children, because in your household, all that should matter to you is that you can look in the mirror each day and without a doubt find something to be proud of with regard to the woman staring back at you. It’s also a bonus if your children are benefiting from the example you are setting.

#2. What you put in your mouth. Like, seriously, YOLO. YOLO. YOLO. Eat the damn cake.

#3. What your kids are wearing. Ask yourself — are they wearing pants? — and if the answer is yes, you have success.

#4. What you are wearing. Seriously, don’t wear a bra one day, it will be fine. Wearing Wal-Mart flip-flops? Me too. Are you mixing prints today because it was all you could find that was clean? Own it.

#5. What the heck your friends (or anyone) thinks of your children. They are not your child’s parent. They know nothing about the inner workings of your child’s personality. They don’t know the extreme highs and lows your unique and intense children put you through day after day, so they just need to get over the fact that you are bribing your son with lollipops, appeasing your daughter with her pacifier, and that yelling mommy makes a regular appearance. This is your life and you are trying to both live and survive it — any way you can is acceptable.

#6. What kind of car you drive. It doesn’t freakin’ matter if you drive a beat-up old Camry, a Cadillac Escalade, or a smelly, messy van. What matters is that your vehicle of choice or circumstance keeps you and your precious cargo safe. That is all that matters.

#7. What your “job” is. While I absolutely believe that each and every one of us has to have a job — be it one that gives you a consistent paycheck, one that pays in hugs and kisses, or one that doesn’t pay at all — all that matters is that you are doing something you enjoy and are passionate about; I don’t give a hoot what your official title (or lack thereof) is.

#8. How much you weigh. Seriously, no one can really tell or cares if you gained 10-20 lbs. over the holidays or while on vacation. Your beautiful heart, your humor, and your intelligence — that’s what you should care about and that’s what you should tend to.

#9. How clean your house is. As long as DFS wouldn’t deem your home to be unsanitary, accept the mess. Not only is it a sign of the memories being made in the home, but it is also the sign of a bright mom who has decided not to unnecessarily burden herself with what doesn’t matter in life.

#10. How perfect your life looks. In fact, I challenge you (and myself) to make 2019 your year of celebrating all that is imperfect. If you go through life like that, you’ll find numerous things to celebrate each and every day.

So what’s the takeaway here? Drop your bra and eat the damn cake. And do both of those inside of your messy house, in your WalMart flip-flops, while not giving a flying fudgesicle about what anyone thinks of you. Cheers to a shiitake-free year!

This post originally appeared on jthreeNMe and was later republished by Grown and Flown and Sammiches and Psych Meds.