When my husband and I were informed that we were having twins, we didn’t quite know how to react. We were thrilled but at the same time, we couldn’t help thinking about the logistics and the overall preparation.
Apart from all the minor expenses of diapers etc., we realized we would probably need a larger house and a bigger car. What we didn’t realize at the time was how having twins would change everything – it would be an exhilarating, exhausting, nerve-wracking, fulfilling roller coaster ride.
While one slept, the other one was awake
We had experienced very little sleep when our son, Alex, was born but those first few months after the birth of our twins, Mark and Melissa, were unlike anything either of us had ever experienced before.
I had imagined that both babies would sleep at the same time but this wasn’t the case. While one slept, the other was awake. Between the crying and feeding, I sometimes managed to grab a few hours of sleep.
Every day in the first year, I experienced a range of emotions – from feeling sorry for myself and tearful to the joy of experiencing squishy little bodies and gummy smiles.
Twins generate a great deal of noise and upheaval. Seeing Alex trying to adjust to a life in which he is no longer an only child was difficult for me. No matter how much I tried to draw him in, I knew that he missed our times when we played alone together. He has grown to love his twin siblings very much but those early days were hard for him when they were center stage.
Fresh air and exercise made a difference
Purchasing a twin jogging stroller was one of our best decisions. We looked at a variety of different strollers before making our decision because we wanted something that gave the twins a comfy ride. It needed to be fairly lightweight and yet able to negotiate some of the bumpy terrain that surrounds our house.
Often just getting everyone clothed and out of the door without being covered in poop, spit or milk felt insurmountable but once outside, the relief was immense. Getting outdoors and having some fresh air and exercise was my saving grace in those early months. On great days, I would meet other mothers at the park and the twins would fall asleep on the way home in the stroller.
I couldn’t believe the perfection of the two little bodies, especially when they lay gazing at one another. In those moments, when they were drawing comfort from being together, all the sleepless nights didn’t matter. You start to feel pretty special that you have been granted such a miracle and that makes getting through those first difficult months possible.
As the twins started to grow up and I watched them play together and look out for one another, I realized just how privileged they were to have such close companionship.
You have to take attention in your stride
When you have twins, everyone seems fascinated and they tend to ask you lots of questions such as “Do twins run in your family?” and “Did you go through IVF?” All the fuss you generate wherever you go can be a blessing and the positive interaction can lift your spirits.
Of course, people can also be insensitive and rude which is a problem when you’re lacking in sleep and have to restrain yourself from snapping at them. Learning to take all the attention in your stride is just one of the many adjustments you have to make as the mother of twins.
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