“Look at how good I used to look,” My mom friend said, holding up a picture of her former self. “I was so skinny.”

I looked up and saw the photo of you in a short skirt, no wrinkles or worries present on your being. You were carefree, with no responsibilities-- except for yourself.

But I don’t want to see your before pictures.

You are different after you have kids. Your body does change, but so does your life.

Yes, mama, you were skinny before. Skinny by society’s measure. You may have felt the most confident you ever had in a bikini or in short shorts. You may have gone to the beach and not thought twice about the cellulite on the back of your thighs and midsection—because maybe it was minimal or even nonexistent. You may have even had a six pack and not that mini-keg that you are rocking today. You thought you looked good--- on some days you maybe even threw around the term “hot." But if you are more like me, that is still only a temperature gauge you solely use when you are overheated. Bottom-line, according to society, you looked “better."

But I don’t want to see your before pictures.

Because I don’t judge myself or others by the same standards society dictates anymore.

Before photos merely capture a moment in time and focus primarily on the physical. Take that one photo where you look back at in “awe” of your body—the one of you at your best friend’s wedding. You hardly ate the week before. You looked good—hair, makeup, body to society’s standards-- but you were absolutely miserable. You felt nauseous from starving yourself, and all you could think about was when you could finally have that delicious slice of pizza. You weren’t enjoying the moment, your date, the music—any of it.

So, I don’t want to see your before pictures.

Show me the pictures of you doing something you are proud of. Show me the pictures of your babies. Show me the photos of the memories you are making. Those are the pictures I want to see.

Because that's where I think you truly look your best because that is your happiest. Your smile is so big and genuine. It's the most real it has ever been because your life is so full. You are being you, and that speaks beyond an image.

So please don’t show me your before pictures.

I want to see the experiences from before and after baby-- not the pictures mourning the loss of a body.

Because I personally couldn’t be happier that body and life are gone, because this newer one--- I would never trade for the world because of what it created, and what it has. And I think you look better now through this lens too.

This post was originally seen on Facebook.