The noise is overwhelming.

The news headlines of Covid outbreaks, our newsfeeds drowning in negativity and bickering, our politicians, neighbors, and family all bull-horning their opinions far and wide to whoever will listen. Or argue.

No earplugs or isolating can erase the racket.

This holiday season, I have to be more intentional about gifting myself some quiet. Turn the t.v. off with it's all-consuming melodrama. Listen to my two teens guffaw about some dumb TikTok. Drink my coffee in front of the fireplace and hear the crackle of flames. Let some stillness seep into the space between my thoughts.

Let my anxiety purposefully unravel and then get stuffed in the junk drawer where it belongs.

In the weeks and days before Christmas, I am going to slow down instead of plowing forward at warp speed. I give myself permission this year to spend more time lazing on the couch with my husband and two dogs than rushing around cleaning, decorating, perfecting, and stressing.

It has been a year for us all. These last few weeks of 2020 need to be met with copious amounts of grace, some serious reflection, and definitely a little humor.

Things are heavy but in the quiet of my own home, I am safe. I can put them down. I can welcome in the stillness.

I can sit in it as long as I like.

And I will.

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