Perhaps it's me who's learning more as we distance learn.

Figuring out how to balance three varied-aged kids' schedules and workloads.

Navigating how to support each of them, equally, in a way that caters to their divergent, individualistic personalities.

Observing and honing in what is working for our family unit and steering clear of what's not.

Discerning the best way to balance my children's needs and my own, and, if he's lucky enough and I have any energy left, my husband's.

I've never been a patient person. Indeed not as a child, and really not even as an adult.

But riding out this pandemic and the waves it's made to our routine, semi-predictable, steady mode of operating, it has got me agitated, frustrated, and always fearful of drowning under the weight of trying to be a good human while trying to stay married to one while raising three.

And so,

I just keep trying,

day after day,

hour after hour,

minute after minute,

to be calm,

full of faith,

lead with love,

and trust that me and mine are fully capable of

taking on a storm that created some rough seas for us,

riding the drifts,

attempting to enjoy the adventure,

and knowing we will be absolutely fine because we have each other.

Ain't nothing like a pandemic to bring to light where you're flawed as a parent and person.

But ain't nothing like a pandemic to highlight how effing resilient you are.

As I said, maybe it's me who's learning more as we distance learn.

In fact, I'm confident that's the case.