Most people assume that if you have a child in the NICU they were born prematurely. In our case we are the parents of a medically complex warrior born at 39 weeks gestation only weighing 5lbs 7oz. Unlike so many others we knew our home would be the NICU as our son would be born with Esophageal Atresia in which there is a portion of the esophagus missing without connection to the stomach. Our son would need surgery, we just didn't know when. I'm not sure if knowing makes it easier or harder, what I do know is that every NICU parent and child are fighting a fight that makes our capacity to love a whole lot bigger.

Below are some of the things that make us NICU parents.

You might be a NICU parent if:

1. You don't get to hold your child immediately after they are born.

2. You ask your husband to leave you when you haven't recovered from your csection so that your baby isn't alone when they are taken to the NICU.

3. You go to a recovery room and if you've had a csection are forced to lay there for hours before seeing your baby.

4. You know all of the beeps on the monitor by heart: oxygen, respiratory, heart rate, air in line, infusion complete, the list goes on.

5. You pump like it's your job - the most important job you have.

6. Your nurses become your friends and the people you trust most

7. Your medical jargon vocabulary increases drastically and you give your input in rounds every single morning at 6am.

8. Every time you mark an item off your baby's checklist it is like winning an Olympic medal

9. You celebrate when your baby graduates to newborn diapers from preemie diapers.

10. You cry when you get to breastfeed or kangaroo care with your baby for the first time because you've been deprived of that moment for weeks or months.

11. You live apart from your spouse. I lived in the NICU while my husband could only come up on the weekends. We had to deliver in Chicago for our son's care, 2hours away from home.

12. You FaceTime your husband with your baby so your child will know your husbands voice. If you are a parent who has to leave the hospital your heart aches with every goodbye.

13. There are setbacks and delays in discharge. In our case our son ended up needing a second surgery. You learn that everything is on your baby's schedule.

14. Social workers, security guards and even the cafeteria cook know you by name.

15. You thank God for every milestone your baby reaches.

16. You can only hold your baby about 5 feet from their crib because of their wires.

17. You have to pass a car seat exam to go home to make sure your baby will be able to sustain a drive home.

18. You become an expert on your babies condition and insist on caring for them every way you can in the NICU

19. You are secretly terrified of leaving because you won't have the nurses to help you take care of your child once you get home.

20. Once you get home it's hard to fall asleep without the sound of monitors. You also don't sleep because you watch your baby to make sure they are still breathing.