Thomas enjoying a less chaotic bath.
Even first time Moms, like myself, know there will be poo and lots of it. But nothing ever prepares you for the unexpected explosions that bring horror to your face and have you panicking over what to do next. Like the time Thomas took his first trip to Grandma’s house in Texas. He was only a few months old. I was so relieved, and quite frankly impressed, with how well he did on the plane - no crying, no ear pressure pain, no get-me-out-of-here stiff back action. We had survived his first flight disaster free, or so we thought.
Almost immediately after taking the all-important first photo at Grandma’s house, the unexpected happened. It’s a two-pronged phenomenon really. I was holding Thomas when I heard the grunt and then felt the explosion. Only, the “after-shock” was all mine. Somehow the poo hit his diaper with such force it shot up his back. A big brown, smelly stain was soaking through his shirt. In disbelief, I looked at my Mom with desperation. Where was I going to bathe him? The sink was too small and the bathtub was too big for a 3-month old. We hadn’t had time to buy a baby bathtub yet. For goodness sake, we had just landed! The timing was impeccable.
With panic in our eyes, and laughing hysterically, my Mom rushed to the garage and emerged with a large turkey roasting pan. Oh my, we were about to bathe my precious baby boy in a pan reserved for holiday fowl. It was “foul” alright. To keep him from slipping and sliding, I wrapped the pan in a bath towel and filled it with water. I could see the confusion on Thomas' face. It's like he was saying, "Seriously Mom, have you lost your mind?!!"
All that talk of giving your baby a relaxing bath went down the drain. My only mission was to get him poo free as quickly as possible. Look, sometimes when you’re faced with a really crappy situation, all you can do is improvise. So don’t beat yourself up about not being that perfect Mom. Here’s a secret: There’s no such thing! Life is messy and unpredictable. But in the midst of chaos, our funniest failures might just be some of our most cherished memories.
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