Alright, I’m totally going there.

Why do women hold their pee?

Why do women not use public bathrooms"?

(I’m not an expert….but we have to get this topic out there, ladies….we’ve been around the block….we’re older and wiser…IT IS TIME!)

Let’s be honest.

Boys can fart and be proud…..girls ‘toot’ and they’re mortified.

It is ingrained in our brain….

How many times have you been on a road trip and you really have to go….but you don’t pull over….you basically make yourself so crazy uncomfortable holding it….because you don’t want to ‘take the time’ and you basically run with your legs crossed to the bathroom when you actually DO STOP.

BUT

If the roles were reversed, and your husband had to go……it doesn’t matter if you’re in a traffic jam…he will find a way!

What is it about women and using the bathroom…..

Think about this a minute…..

I know I have to pee…..

BUT

I am so cozy in bed right now, I don’t want to get up

I can just fold this load of laundry and then go

If I just unload this dishwasher, and send this e-mail, then I’ll make time to go to the bathroom

Oh no…I’m going to be late to lunch….I’ll just go when I get there

What the heck is wrong with us?

We already have bladder control issues…there are more commercials outlining products wrapped in pretty pink paper (are you kidding me) after giving birth… just a light cough sends us into a panic…..and don’t even mention jumping jacks….

I have to be transparent…honest….I don’t understand (or maybe I’m just envious of) the women that can do jumping jacks, jump rope, jump off wooden boxes….and not have any ‘issues’…..where did I go wrong?

Oh….wait - I can answer that question…..I held it in too long and it stretched everything to crazy town.

And since I’ve opened Pandora’s box….how many can relate to this….

You have your morning coffee….and you get that stomach grumble….you know the one…the one that says….it’s time…things are moving down there….

But once again…..

You either put it off….hold it in (if we are in a public place)

or we run to the absolute opposite end of the hallway, or even a different floor if we need to…..

And as we are doing this….a man waltzes right past with a newspaper in his hands….and you know where he’s going…and what’s he’s about to do

I think we need to start standing up for each other on this whole ‘holding it thing’

We need to take time to pee when we need to…..I guess we could make signs….that say, Pee time (instead of tea time)

and we have to get over this whole public bathroom anxiety thing…..

Here are some stats I found when I started writing this piece…and to be honest - there are articles out there circulating all over the internet about just this….

Women and bathroom issues….

46% of women reported they have avoided going to a public bathroom and 40% of women wait until the bathroom is vacant to go. 45% of women are embarrassed to ‘poop’ in a public bathroom, and 23% of women actually admitted to going to another floor of their office building to go.

We are a bunch of crazy ladies, aren’t we…..

I don’t know if any of you watch Shark Tank ….but there is a product that is ergonomically (which simply means designed for comfort) correct for ‘pooping’……yup - right up with the ‘pool noodle millionaire’ is the ‘squatty potty millionaire’….

So…enough about the bathroom, right…I think I’ve made my point. But heck, this is a time in our life that we have been in the trenches….we have put in the work….and we need to make the time for peeing and pooping…it should be at the top of the self care agenda!

Here’s our pact, ladies!

No judging….no one really cares…..just go do your business….and don’t hold it….don’t run a million miles to another building or try to pee or poop quietly when you know there’s someone in the next stall…..

I say just let it rip…..all the sounds and smells that go along with it!

So next time you’re at HomeGoods or Target….channel your ‘Inner Amy’ and while you’re at it…..don’t fold that load of laundry….vacuum the steps, or any other outlandish thing we do….when we really should be taking time to pee…..

Go to the bathroom when you need to…..we’ll all be better off! Our bladders and colons will love us for it!