The lobbyist is such a part of Washington D.C.

That if you scare them off it will bring but calamity.

Who will treat our lawmakers to nourishing repasts?

Who will give them trinkets and make them golf enthusiasts?

How can Congress function if they lack their expertise?

Who will think of new ways all the taxpayers to fleece?

Their photosensitivity makes them afraid of light.

Their modesty keeps them active in the middle of the night.

They are a symbiotic group that loyally upholds

The fatcats and protects them from a multitude of scolds.