There is no such thing as perfect balance.
It does not exist. You see, we spend a third of our lives sleeping, a third of our lives working and then a third of our life filling in the gaps, the sport, the games that, but music, concerts, high school graduation, the vacations.
If you're real about it and you want to go take something and grow something, you're going to be out of balance, but what does that even mean?
It just means that you're not going to spend equal amounts of time. Now, as a parent, you might hear this and have this guilt and have this shame come all over you because you think you've got to spend equal time with your children.
Our job as a man is to provide. That is what we do. We provide, we hunt with, we hunt Buffalo, we bring home the bacon. We not only provide but we protect, we protect our families from internal things that could bring our homes down from external things like there's a lot of evils out in the world.
I heard a podcast by Setema Gali, The Prosperity Revolution, where he went through this exact topic, and how men should be in balance.
He told a story about when he was knocking doors as a door to door salesman. He was struggling and broke - late on the rent, late on the car, late on utility payments.
Because of the situation he was in, he was not able to be in balance with his spouse of kids. He had to work more hours than he spent with your family.
So he came up with an “agreement balance”.
He agreed with his family that he would be there for breakfast in the morning, to have dinner at night, and would be home and present all day Sunday. But at 8:30 weeknights, he was back at work until midnight.
His wife knew that they had some enormous goals and she agreed that they would be out of balance for awhile.
But they came to an agreement on expectations. So instead of trying to be in perfect balance, they agreed to live in with the agreement balance.
He also made a great point about why we as men need to take care of ourselves first.
There's a reason why you put your mask on first on an airplane - because if you don't, you die.
He recommends getting up early every morning to exercise, drink warm lemon water, read, and meditate. Then, set an evening or two each week to prep healthy meals and clean out your car.
And Moms should take care of themselves first too...not your kids. Put yourself first so you can be in a place of power so you can lead with love.
Take time to go get your pedicure and your manicure. Get a babysitter. So you can go take yourself out with your girlfriends and go on a night on the town, get away on a vacation with your spouse.
If you are a single parent, you need to have the agreement balance with your children.
Once you put yourself first and take care of yourself, then and only then, can you turn around and go make a difference for other people. But if you don't take care of yourself, it's like your car. You don't want to take time to get your wheels balanced, change your oil, spark plugs, and air filters? It's going to cost you a lot more down the road.
Life is too short to not take care of yourself. You take care of yourself. Go create agreements and live in agreement, balance and take care of yourself.
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