“I need coffee.”
“Please don’t poop on the floor.”
“Honey, it’s not possible to make Chocolate Ice Cream Pizza in the blender.”
“Yes, hand dryers are kind of scary.”
“No, the dump truck doesn’t need a bath.”
“Hitting mommy up there is not kind.”
“You know what? Dinosaurs eat broccoli, too.”
“Yes, mommy has hairy legs.”
“Where did I put my coffee?”
“Put. The. Knife. Down.”
“No, your sister doesn’t want to steal your waffle. She’s not even awake. ”
“Please stop touching the car tire.”
“Fine, I will put lotion on the dump truck.”
“Do you want olive oil on your salmon?”
“I hear you, I understand you’re upset. But I won’t let you drink my coffee. I can’t even find it.”
“Why is the floor wet?”
“You’re right. Poop does kind of look like Play-Doh.”
“Fine. We’ll listen to Nirvana again.”
“Hitting daddy down there is also not kind.”
“OK. Let’s put garbage truck under the covers, too.”
“No, really. Where is my coffee?”
“Yes, I will make you a veggie burger.”
“With avocado.”
“Do you want to kiss the astronauts goodbye before we leave?”
“So that is why the floor is wet.”
“I really don’t think there’s a tiger outside the window, but I’ll check.”
And finally-
“You know what? I’ll just drink wine.”
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