Listen to me closely, mama:
You don’t have to Google every single decision you make.
You don’t have to solicit advice from five friends, your mom, three blogs, WebMD and two mommy groups.
I mean, you can…I have for a long time, but you don’t have to.
Don’t misunderstand me, if you’re facing a big decision about a topic you don’t know much about, absolutely do your homework.
And yes, take advantage of all the years of wisdom that surround you in the form of people and life experience.
And if it involves your child’s health or safety, please use your brain and consult an expert.
But I’m not talking about those types of decisions.
I’m talking about the thousands of everyday choices we make all the time as mothers. The gray area decisions where it’s more about parenting philosophy than right and wrong.
We second guess ourselves at every single turn. We question our instinct and our convictions. We wrestle with what’s “right” and socially acceptable and what other moms in the playgroup will think about our choices.
Anxiety told me that every decision was of life or death importance, and often, paralyzed me from making any decision at all.
But the truth is, a whole lot of them won’t matter very much in the big picture of life.
You know your own children better than anyone else on the planet, and I truly believe there’s something to be said for a mother’s intuition.
We moms have a built-in compass just like we have our conscience to offer us an innate sense of right and wrong.
And it’s time that we start trusting that a little bit more.
So, let’s start listening to what feels good to our mama hearts, and stop thinking so much about the “right” way or the popular way or the way that would ruffle the least feathers.
My son hasn’t been his happy self today, and when he woke up early and cranky from his nap, all the self-doubt started.
Should I put him back down? Maybe I should call the doctor. Should I rock him instead? If I rock him now, will that throw off his sleep schedule tonight? You know what they say about sleep training and co-sleeping. I don’t want to spoil him, but I want him to know I care.
STOP.
This is the kind of crap I’m talking about.
You’re their mama – in these type of everyday situations, just do what feels good to you.
I picked that cranky boy up and rocked him until he fell back asleep. Then I sat with him for a little bit longer, just because I could.
Because I’M his mom, and in that moment, we both just needed some togetherness.
You’re not going to ruin your baby because you rocked them or sleep trained them, because you did time-out or respectfully parented them.
You’re not going to cause irreparable damage because you fed them organic or let them enjoy some Chick-fil-A, because you kept them home or sent them to daycare.
The fact that you care so much to get it right tells me you’re a good mother.
Start trusting your decisions a little bit more, mama. Listen to that inner voice. Let go of some of that doubt and worry.
You’re smart,
you’re strong,
you’re capable,
and you’ve got this.
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