Can I be really honest right now?
I'm about to start crying.
My kids never stop talking. Every single thought I attempt is interrupted. I can't get a full sentence out—or half a mental note in—before someone cuts me off. Even the easiest tasks seem too hard. Today the noise feels like it might kill me.
Me: Begins email. Dear—
Kid 1: Listen to this tongue twister! (Continues to repeat it 80 bazillion times.)
Me: Nice! Okay, go play so I can finish—
Kid 2: Mom! I have to poop!
Me: Let's get to the bathroom! Sit on the potty and—
Kid 1: Mom, I can't find my pencil.
Me: Just use a—
Kid 2: Mom, look at my poop!
Me: Great job! Now let's get you wi—
Kid 1: Mom, listen to this song I just made up!
Me: Okay, sing it while I fin—
Kid 2: Can I have a sucker?
Me: Here, have one. Now sit down. I'm going to finish this emai—
Kid 1: CHATTERCHATTERCHATTER.
Me: Gives up on email. Decides to order groceries online instead because it takes less concentration. Logs into account, searches for mil—
Kid 2: Jumps off chair, runs in circles, screams with sucker in mouth.
Me: SIT DOWN. Realizes that online grocery store logged me out. Log in again, search for mil—
Kid 1: Can I have— Kid 2: No! I want it!
Me: NO ONE IS GETTING ANYTHING. Go play so I can order groceries. Takes deep breath. Okay, I need to get—
Both kids: Go downstairs where screaming, crying, and mysterious thud take place.
Me: Gives up on everything.
Seriously, writing a short email that actually makes sense doesn't seem feasible. Ordering groceries online is completely overwhelming. Everything feels impossible.
Sometimes I wonder why God made them this way.
Why did he create these tiny beings that are NEVER quiet when he knew tired moms would be desperate for silence and a few minutes to think?
Perhaps it's a test of endurance or a lesson in patience. Maybe it's supposed to help better my listening skills.
Or maybe it's just one of the many trying circumstances that we, as moms, face on this earth.
Right now, I'm angry, frustrated, and extremely annoyed.
So I'm turning on the TV for them, without guilt, and thanking God for the gift of screen time.
Because I need a break before I break. And right now, the ol' boob tube is the greatest support I've got.