As moms, we aim to go through life being as pleasant as possible to everyone we meet. However, this isn’t always possible. Sometimes you find your blood boiling over something as simple as a spoon put away in the wrong place.

When I find myself getting angry over little things like this, I know I am stressed and it’s time to de-stress. Last week, my four-year-old suddenly forgot how to tie her shoelaces. This, after knowing how to do it for the last year. I was in a hurry to get her to school on time and completely lost my cool. Over shoelaces. Two pieces of string made me angry.

After tying her laces, rushing her to school, and getting home in time to bring in the empty garbage cans, I reflected. Why was I so worked up over shoelaces? What was it about the shoelaces that made me angry? Then, I realized I was stressed.

How to de-stress

De-stressing is not something to be taken lightly. Some of you may be lucky enough to head out for a massage or to the spa each week. Some of us are not as lucky. If it’s not the work that is piling up, it’s a financial emergency that renders it impossible.

Asking your husband or kids to massage your feet may result in tantrums and you feel guilty about asking. An easier way around this is to set aside some money for foot massage devices. You don’t have to ask anyone to do it, and you can use “foot massage time” as a way to get some time to yourself.

A foot massage may seem simple, but it works wonders for me. Doing it in the evening before bed, I add some lavender essential oil to the water of my foot spa and just allow the process to relax me. Lavender essential oils are great for relaxation. Using it as massage oil or putting a few drops on your pillow at night can also being relaxation and better sleep.

While it may be obvious to most that a first-time mom or a mom with small children has every right to be stressful, it may seem confusing that I, a woman with a four-year-old, have anything to stress about at all. Besides, I am a stay-at-home mom. How hard is it, really?

Stressors for moms

Many people would like to believe that stay-at-home moms have it easy. Even easier when the children are off at school all day and we get to stay home doing nothing. Some of the critics will ask what is really so hard about staying at home all day with the children off at school.

As a stay-at-home mom, I do many different things throughout the day. I care for the health of my family, drive them where they need to be, make food, teach them things and help with homework, play with them, clean the house, do the laundry, and take care of the household finances. Making sure all of these tasks are completed on time and to a particular standard is even more stressful than the tasks themselves.

If you are a working mom, your work is even harder. On top of doing all the things a stay-at-home mom does, you also need to be at work on time each day. This limits the amount of time you have to dedicate to the other tasks.

Next time a stranger criticizes you for having an easy life as a mom, just remember all the things you do for your family. If they say you have it easy, you must be doing it so well that it looks easy.