I have always taken a lot of pictures of Kya mostly because I am always trying to get that one shot of her looking or happy

, but some stand out more than others.

This one stood out.

People often ask me what anxiety looks like on Kya.

Here it is.

Notice her hands?

My girl was extremely anxious.

Saturday morning, we needed groceries toiletries and so on. We have a new Walmart Supercentre so I figured a one stop shop would be best.

Walmart on a Saturday what was I thinking?

The lights are too bright, and the sounds and crowds are too big.

She did great. She went up and down the aisles right beside me but towards the end her anxiety was heightened and then came the huge Saturday lines.

I quickly scanned my cart to see if there was anything I had to have. Reality was all of it, but I was ready to leave it all.

That is anxiety.

I often say my daughter’s anxiety sits on top of her.
And this picture speaks to that.

But she waited in line and she left happy!

These outings were once nothing more than a dream. I could not imagine us ever being able to do this it was just too hard.

But we kept trying.

We often failed but we kept trying.

There was a time when we could not leave our home.

We sat in darkness.

The world outside our door was too much.

But somewhere along the way we tried again.

Is it perfect?

Heck no.

In fact, I was shaking in line as she was stimming and not fully understanding where we needed to stand.

Whose idea was it anyway to put glass wine displays along the aisles? Gesh way to give me a heart attack!

This girl of mine is fierce.

She does not have an easy time. Everything is harder for her yet everyday she wants to go into the world.

I see her struggle and I see her work through it.

I am in awe of her.

On we go.

#Autism