Hope for 2021. I cried as the nurse gave it to me (which made her tear up), as I said “This is answered prayers from the dark days of April.”

I have prayers of gratitude for the brilliant minds who invented this new type of vaccine, that will forever change vaccines, and the manufacturers and truck drivers who got it to where it needs to go.

Working at the hospital through all of this forever changed me, and I’m grateful it’s just a few days a month, because honestly it’s too heartbreaking.

It’s not just the mortality rate of this vicious disease, it’s the things that happen to your body months later, when you think you’re out of the woods. It’s watching people wake up one morning to discover they can’t swallow, speak, or walk. It’s watching a hospital be at max capacity and patients having nowhere to go. It’s watching people die (from anything, because there are still accidents, cancer, strokes and all of the things) without their loved ones, because they couldn’t have visitors, and people didn’t get to say goodbye.

It’s watching the elderly be isolated and never having one more holiday with their families. It’s watching friends lose loved ones and not being able to gather to say goodbye and grieve the way they deserved to. It’s watching my healthcare worker friends never be the same, because they do this job day in and day out and it is mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausting.

This vaccine in my arm is my hope on the horizon. It’s my hope that life will soon return to the normalcy which we took for granted. If you choose not to get the vaccine when it’s time, or you’re unable to or whatever your viewpoint is, I hope you still do all you can to help us help you.

Our hope is on the horizon. I felt it and saw it and lived it today.